Yesterday was not a good day. Stress levels were high for a number of work related reasons as well as the fact that my big move is happening this weekend. I was a bit of a wreck yesterday. On my way home I stopped by my boyfriends house and what I heard there made everything else absolutely insignificant.


One of my friends had been killed. Brutally and senselessly murdered. She had a two month old baby who she was probably holding at the time. The baby was fine. She didn't make it. Reading the newspaper and the details they give has just made it all 10 times worse.


Faith in God, means that I believe that God was there and had the situation under his control. The "why did he allow it?" question, I can't answer. Maybe in heaven I'll find out that answer. Why did it have to be so violent? - I don't know.


I just pray that her husband is able to cope with this and knows God's amazing peace and strength through this all. I don't know how I would cope. I just pray that somehow much good would come through this. That people would be shaken up and that they will question what is going to happen to them when they die. How do they know they will go to heaven? On what are they basing their assumption that they will go to heaven?


It is not enough that we have not murdered anyone. That isn't how God and heaven works. God is perfect, we are not and heaven is where God is - perfection. We can't be with perfection if we aren't perfect.


This is an example that I think of that I think explains it fairly well: A dirty, smelley person wants to be in a room that smells nice and has nice clean things. However, if they go into that room, they will mess it up, because they are dirty and no one will want to be in the room with them. That is how it is with God. We have to be clean to be with him. If we aren't, he can't let us in otherwise it will mess it up for everyone.

We need Jesus Christ and his death on the cross to make us clean before God. Nothing else makes us clean.

And one day, the person/people who so brutally murdered my friend will stand before God. I would not want to be standing in their shoes on that day.

God's rules don't work the same as the world. The panic button to summon the security company was triggered, the security company arrived, everything seemed to be done right, which goes to show that we can't put our faith in things of the world.

If you are reading this post and think that there is no emotion in it - I would like to say that I have cried.... and cried.... and cried.... and I wish I could change things.... and I'm angry... and shocked... and my heart breaks for her husband and 2 month old baby - but you can't put everything into a blog post.